January 1, 2012...Sixth Day

Happy new Year Hyderabad!

New Year’s Day in Hyderabad is just as busy and crazy as any other day. Feeling sleepy, lazy and need of a comfort day, we woke up and headed to the Hard Rock Cafe for burgers. It was a beautiful and sunny day and we decided to stroll back to the hotel and relax by the pool.

Pool side chatter....

We chatted about our choice in clinics and how I researched for at least a year before I choose Kiran Infertility Center. William wanted to know how I ended up choosing where to go. Which I think is the 64 million rupee question.

We already tried donor eggs in New York, however without success. I underwent IVF three times with no luck. Complications for me were; I just could not get my baby Padding up, no matter what drugs were given to me, what diet I tried, what acupuncture I underwent or any tips or tricks that I read about. Our doctors suggested that we could try again with me or use a surrogate.

Now as my American friends will know, using a surrogate in America is not the easiest and economical choice for surrogacy. First we would have to go to a parent friendly state, such as California. Next we would have to rob a bank. The cost was too high for us and we were being transferred to Hong Kong to boot. So I had to find an alternative way to achieve our dream of having a family.

While I was in Hong Kong I first checked where would be a good place in Asia. My research led me to Thailand.  My first thoughts were great, wonderful country, fantastic people and a short trip from Hong Kong. Now I know there have been many successful transfers and babies have been born to surrogates in Thailand, however it was not for me. My reason was that they have not been doing surrogacy for too long and I felt that the experience was not there. I understand that I could be completely wrong and I am sure there are parents in the world that did their surrogacy in Thailand with great success; it was just my gut feeling that I decided to look elsewhere.

I also dismissed Russia, Georgia, Cyprus, Ukraine and some country in Africa which I cannot remember at the moment. My reasons were a number of things, anywhere from experience of clinics, safety of the country and costs. I was also losing my mind with all the places in the world that could assist me. Where to go? What to do? It's not like you can check with a consumer magazine to see what's new and cutting edge.

Then I remembered when I was in New York that our doctor suggested India. He would not recommend a clinic in India, however he thought that the experience was there and I should look into the options. So I started researching India, which is no easy feat. There must be thousands of clinics in India and the majorities seem to be clustered in Delhi and Mumbai. Also there were clinics in Hyderabad, Chennai and other cities that I no longer remember. However I decided India is where we would try to make our dream of a family come true.

What did I do?

·         I started researching news stories in the USA, Canada, UK, and India and anywhere else I could find.

·         I started reading every blog I could on the internet that related to surrogacy.

·         I joined a few community groups related to surrogacy and trolled through the discussions.

·         I contacted medical tourism sites and inquired about their services in regards to surrogacy.

·         I started contacting clinics and asked a million questions, the ones I was interested in, I requested information about their policies, procedures, prices and contracts.

·          I contacted a law firm in the UK to engage in Indian Surrogacy Law and our legal status to do surrogacy in India.

·         I asked for referrals and talked to other parents who used various clinics in India.

Then…

I took a deep breath, choose three clinics that I felt were right for us and presented all my data for each clinic to William, my mother and a couple who went through surrogacy in California and had twins. I thought this was a good idea, due to you can get so emotionally involved and presenting my findings to other people who would look at it differently that I would give me another insight.

I don’t know if this was right or wrong and I am sure I could have done more and would really love to hear your feedback on how you made your choice.

After all that reflecting we were starving and headed to Syn, located at the Hotel Taj Deccan.  A mixture of Thai, Vietnamese and Japanese flavours.  Sushi and Thai were the choice for the night!